The Single Change That Worked: How I Overcame Post-Work Tension Via an Unexpected Find in the Attic

I frequently become as tense as a wound-up clock once the workday ends. Tension grips my shoulders, my breath turns fast and shallow. Usually, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut used to lead to the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, wine poured quickly into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Later, a few months ago, I came across my now-adult son’s old school recorder up in the loft. I idly blew into it, immediately transported back to the days it was the bane of my life – his daily rehearsals felt like an attack on my ears, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head hours after he had gone to bed.

But rather than consigning it to the bin, I took it down, along with a book – Very Easy Recorder Tunes. As a child, I was the least musical child ever. I’d had recorder lessons at infant school, yet never got to try other instruments.

Searching online for recorder tutorials, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and got a fingering guide on paper. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Yes, a typical young child could learn it quickly, yet for a stressed, impatient, musically-challenged adult, it seemed like a major triumph.

My son asked what the hell I was doing (and please could I stop), but I persevered – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. Forgetting notes easily meant I had to concentrate on the sheet of paper in front of me, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breathing slowed down, I was focused, and after nailing that initial shaky melody, I felt euphoric. I could play an instrument.

Now, several months later, I can handle other children’s songs and a passable Ode to Joy. Yes, my timing is rubbish, and I must jot down note names, but for me, it’s not about being skilled or a “musician” – it’s purely about the joy it provides and how it clears my mind while playing.

I learned that few kids play the recorder today, which was no doubt music to parents’ ears, yet it made me wistful for my school years, as well as my son’s.

I make it a habit to play each night after work before I do anything else, and in those 20 or so minutes, I am in my own little world. Afterward, I feel refreshed and happy.

My friends find it amusing, but one very wise therapist friend told me that I was reducing stress, but improving my cognitive skills, like memory and sound processing, which is precious at my age. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s a real “ode to joy” indeed.